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The discovery in her late 20s that she was conceived using a sperm donor was a huge shock to Sarah Dingle. But learning there was no possibility of finding out the name of her biological father was even more disturbing.

It was Easter last year. Mum and I were at a Vietnamese restaurant in Sydney. At 27, I was vaguely aware that there was no longer infinite time left for me to have children. I loved my job as a reporter. I didn't want kids any time soon. But I didn't want all my options to vanish while I was busy filing stories. So sitting there, facing her, I asked the question.

"Mum, you know how you had me late," I said cautiously. "Did you have any problems conceiving me?" Her eyes flickered. She is Malaysian Chinese, with short salt-and-pepper hair. She moved in her seat. "Maybe this isn't the right time to tell you." Shrug. "But your father is not your father. We had problems conceiving and it turned out your father couldn't. So we used a donor."

WHAT...